its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
