She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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