Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
ok first of all what the fuck
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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