I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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