he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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