Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Randomize
