Betty ford says i'm here all night
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize