i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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