i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
