she was so not down for the gang bang
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
nutella sex= disaster
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
