I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
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