I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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