You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
