I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize
