Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
