and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
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