i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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