I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Randomize
