no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
