So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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