obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
Come see our sink grown plant.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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