I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
i will never coherently bang her
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
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