is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
