The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Randomize
