When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize