Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
