Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Randomize
