is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
