You really coming over, don't trick.
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Randomize