Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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