So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
