Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
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