Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
