You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
