yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize