put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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