Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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