Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize