Ambien. No doubt about it.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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