hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize