roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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