no you cant smoke seaweed
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
