yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
