Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
Randomize