i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize
