He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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