dude i'm inner monologue high
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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