ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Acid is not a monday night drug
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
