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• (708): View more from Illinois

  Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.

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• (206): View more from Washington

  You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..

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• (563): View more from Iowa

  he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.

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• (281): View more from Texas

  Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.

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• (585): View more from New York

  N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.

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• (425): View more from Washington

  That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick

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• (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child

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• (619): View more from California

  I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.

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• (219): View more from Indiana

  He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."

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• (434): View more from Virginia

  Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda

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