Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize
