she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
